I haven't written a poem in a while, but I had a little time today, so I wrote one about Pierce. It was therapeutic. Some lines were totally difficult, and others were healing. Such is the layered existence of an Autism Dad. Even if you don't have an Autistic child, you can probably relate to the paradoxical lines of this poem. I hope it proves therapeutic for you too.
The Spectrum
There's a feather in your hair and a sparkle in your eye
You're living in two worlds that fall under a seamless sky
There's a song in your head and it's waiting to be heard
But you struggle for your voice, you wrestle for a word
There's a part of you that soars on clouds to worlds so far away
And a part of you that's tethered to the darkest shade of grey
You're as clear as a water color hanging on a wall
And as stable as a Summer leaf clinging in the Fall
I cannot understand you and I don't know why I try
When you're near I miss your presence, when your gone I do not cry
Your the most painful love I've ever known, the best/worst thing I have
And I love you dearly for it all, the good times and the sad
I wonder if I'll ever really know quite who you are
Like a dream remembered dimly or a far and distant star
Hidden in your face lies your personality
One of many things about you that reamain a mystery
3 comments:
That was awesome, Steve. People outside your blog need the chance to read that beautiful paradoxical view into your realtionship with Pierce. Thanks for sharing it!
Janet Hall
I love you man! You, more than anyone I know, live in the reality of the pain life gives us. I am sad that you may never fully know what lies behind you child's eyes. But I am thankful that you know him! I am thankful that he is a blessing to you. I am thankful that you desperatley want to deepen your relationship with your children! Autism seems to be a condition that only takes away from those it encounters! I am thankful that you never stop giving to your children, even if it seems that you get anything other than questions and pain in return. Your love for your family always seems to be more important that what you get in return... that is amazing to me! I love you man!
Hi Steve and Kim. I was browsing thru IBC's website when I came across the link to your blog. Ofcourse, I had to see if you had any pics of beautiful Pierce. Found your poem on Autism and your thoughts about this cruel condition. (feelings that you express that I'm just beginning to understand from my limited time with Pierce). I saved his pic to my desktop so that I can be reminded every day to pray for him and your wonderful family. What a blessing Pierce has been to me. We have fun together, in our own kind of way. I wonder if he'll let me be his pal when he's in high school??? Probably not...HA!
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